How do you tell your co-workers?

I was wondering how and when I should inform work regarding my pregnancy. I agree with my friends in general that no one from work should know about my pregnancy until at least after the first trimester.

The challenge is that I am in the middle of projects and resources planning for 2009. Knowing that, it is very difficult for me to justify keeping it a secret when I know I will be taking a 3-month maternity leave next year.

I don’t have a concrete plan how this would come out. On the first day of the planning week, during lunch with two of my senior team members, we were talking about another person who just got married. I then said, “I am getting married in November.” They were happy for me. After lunch, when we got back to the meeting, they unexpectedly said to the team that Joanna has something to announce. So I told everyone I set a date to get married.

Then my female co-worker, who knows of my engagement previously, bluntly asked, “I thought you were thinking about it next spring. Why November? You are not expecting, are you?” Well, at that point, with a direct question and the rest of the team staring back at me, I can no longer not answer the obvious question in front of the team! So they know and they all congratulated me.

You have to understand, my female co-worker is Chinese. Yes, it comes with the territory with the blunt personal questions Western would find intrusive. But as a Chinese, it’s considered normal and acceptable.

During the rest of the week, the planning meeting went well. They definitely seem to know more about pregnancy than me. They know “when” I should not be traveling. They know my due date, and we planned my projects around them and who would be my backup in case I become unavailable early. The whole “coming” out works itself out better than I thought!

I also inform my boss. He's happy for me and said something like “welcome to my world”. He just had a baby girl 7 months ago. I think it is still new for him that he knows how I feel. We agree that we don’t need to contact HR until after the first trimester.