Writing Our Own Vows

This is not my idea at all. A few weeks back, as we were working through the wedding ceremony details with our Officiant, Tom asked if I were to say anything during the wedding. I wasn’t planning to give a speech at all. I derived this plan so I don’t have to anything like that!!! The plan is to have the following:

• My brother, Dennis, is giving the welcome speech
• The best man, Val, is giving a toast
• My maid of Honor, Jennifer, is giving a toast
• Tom is giving a thank you speech

I think that is plenty already. I figure this is going to be a very tight run event. We are in from 4pm to 9pm, a total of 5 hours. Within the 5 hours, we have to do the ceremony, the reception, and the dance afterward, that is a lot of things to cover in such a short time.

Tom said to me, what do you mean you aren’t going to say anything? People are coming to hear what you say. After a bit of back and forth, I found out “HE” wants to hear my declaration of love for him in front of everyone!!!! He even asked if we were to write our own vows. My answer was “errrrrrr, what do you mean?”

Maybe it is the Hollywood movies, but isn’t it supposed to be the bride asking the groom to do such thing instead of the opposite. I never imagine asking Tom to do that because I figure we have plenty of stress already, do we really need to add more pressure to perform??? Well, I guess he wants to do it. So we both agree to write our own declaration of love/commitment/vows/whatever the proper term it is for such message…etc.

It didn’t take long. This past Monday, when I was on my way up to Washington again for business, when I am “along”, meaning along from Tom, when my head is clear from distraction, I drafted up this declaration. We both exchanged it in an email. He asked if I want to hear him say it to me over the phone. I said No, not until the wedding day. I read what he plans to say. But I want to hear it the first time at our wedding ceremony.

So here is what I plan to say. It isn’t going to make any publication but it is very me. And that is good enough.

I have dreamed my whole life of having someone as wonderful as you to love me the way you do. Today, Tom, I join my life to yours, not merely as your wife, but as your friend, your lover, and your confidant.

I love that we work as a team. I love that you get the water when I prepare our dinner. I love that you hug me like a big teddy bear. I love that you are there when I need you. And I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night. And it's not because we need each other, but rather we want each other. Then I realize I want to spend the rest of my life with you.

So from this day forward, I choose you as my husband, and I promise to treasure all our days with the love we celebrate today. Tom, I love you with all my heart.